Carpools and precision lawn mower parades

Not sure what else I wanted to say in the last post- I held onto it to edit- but I think I’ll just post it. Probably thinking about why I titled it the past and the present and then only talked about the past. Yeah- we’ll go with that.

I’m sitting in the carpool line at the moment- watching a big ol’ storm over Paris Mtn. Seen about 4-5 classic sky to ground bolts- thunder counting says they are still at least a mile away- but I’m not excited about the idea of people standing out in the driveway with walkie-talkies with lots of electricity around. The fact is that it’s to our south- which should mean it will be moving away- but no guarantees. Some will think this is associated with Tropical Storm Ernesto- and I can’t see that. I haven’t checked today, but I think the center of circulation is probably still in Fla. somewhere.

So this is a week between reunions. Next weekend is the Cheerio camp reunion. I’m looking forward to it and not. There are people to see- but those I was very closest to- not so much. I am sure I will get asked lots of questions about folks I should have been keeping up with, but haven’t really. I don’t even know what Jen’s baby’s name is! (Or anything about it really…shame heaps itself on my head, rolling off into my consciousness like a big plop of mashed potatoes with gravy on top). Of course, now it looks like it just might rain all weekend. Whoo-hoo!

There is some story George wants me to write down- and I’ve asked him twice now and forgotten it. Something that happened in Live Oak. Can’t seem to lodge it in my head. It looks like the storm s moving to our east- not so much thunder. Whoops- spoke too fast- big lighting bolt. Seems like their going to move the line now- hard to drive and type.

Now I remember the story- I asked George for a third time. When we were in Live Oak, we occasionally watched the Annual Christmas parade. Now, several times, it was only because we forgot they had blocked the road and we tried to go to the grocery store. One year, though, we actually made an effort to go, I think Burke was about a year old. We loaded up and found a spot near the Kmart parking lot. It was what I considered a typical small southern town’s attempt at a parade. City officials in the back of convertibles, pickup trucks with cheerleaders in the back, you know the lot. Then we started to notice that a few churches had ‘floats’- large flat bed trailers being pulled by big honkin’ pickem-up trucks. A few had speakers and music playing- I think one had a band- some Christmas carols. One had several people in sort of a live nativity. But one I remember well, because as they went by (each float probably averaged 2 mph) they threw hard candy out to the onlookers. Mostly they got it all the way over to the crowd, but several misestimated and candy landed on the ground and on the road- once kids figured out there was candy- it was much like the scene when the piñata breaks- kids scrambling onto the road to pick up candy off the ground. I wouldn’t have been letting my kids do that, but it didn’t seem like such a horrible thing until I saw which entry followed the church candy float. It just happened to be followed by the precision lawn mower drivers from the local lawn and garden shop- and they were all driving zero-turn-radius mowers making patterns with swirls, turns and the like- all while wearing festive Santa hats. Now, they didn’t have the blades engaged, I’m sure- but they were also so intent on executing their ‘routine’ that they didn’t exactly pick up on the fact that small children were darting out into the road ahead of them. I did not see any road carnage that day- but the potential was so high and the situation so inane I just had to laugh very hard….sick of me I know. Can’t you just imagine the headline the next day?
“Child maimed by precision lawn mower during parade” LIVE OAK.Fl. A small child whose name is withheld to protect her identity, was seriously injured when she tried to retrieve a piece of Laffy Taffy from the annual parade route and was sideswiped by a zero-turn radius mower, sponsored by John’s Lawn Equipment. Although warned not to enter into the path of the parade, citizens often ignore the warnings and cross the street in front of the slow moving floats. “Candy is what’s to blame,” said Ms Jenga Dunn, an onlooker….oh I could write the whole piece right now! For some actual articles from Live Oak that are just as amusing, but not nearly as well written- check out www.suwanneedemocrat.com. On Dasher, on Prancer, on Toro and John Deere……